我的继坶我的性老师

Chapter 1231 Chapter 1231 Burning Guilt

Which was where she lay now. Staring up at the ceiling. Kat couldn\'t sleep. Sure she could meditate… but she wasn\'t really feeling that either. It had been interesting hearing about how March\'s team got together, as well as everyone\'s various stories. It was an interesting look into the people of this world… but that wasn\'t really the problem.

No the problem for Kat was that she\'d spent the whole day doing nothing, and yet, hadn\'t really relaxed either. It was like her body couldn\'t quite shift out of combat mode. Which was annoying considering she hadn\'t even participated in combat today. The log chopping contest certainly didn\'t count as combat.

Still, perhaps it was enough to trick her mind into thinking she was in a combat situation for some reason. Dodgeball was more easily rationalised away. Even if it wasn\'t really dodgeball, the familiar name probably helped Kat discard it as a problem. So here she was. Laying on the bed with Lily curled up in Memphis form on her chest. Staring at the ceiling.

*So… what are you going to do now Kat? Stare up at the ceiling for the rest of the night? I can get up guilt-free in just six hours, probably five really, even if breakfast won\'t be ready by that point. Probably shouldn\'t push it back to four. Though it\'s not like Lily will be awake before eight, and even then I might have to wake her up to ensure she eats breakfast. Though, once again, I\'m not participating today so I suppose it doesn\'t truly matter.

What else could I do? Wake up and train? I know what I want to train… but what if cutting of the link while Lily is dreaming wakes her up? I\'d hate for my restlessness to wake her, and even worse, if she feels my pain through the link and starts thinking that something bad has happened to me. I\'d feel just awful if that happened. Lily would probably struggle to go back to sleep after that as well…*

Kat was likely underestimating Lily\'s ability to sleep, and sleep through things. Especially when their connection was deep enough that distinguishing \'pain\' from \'pain, panic and surprise\' at being attacked or something similar, was quite strong. In the end though, it was at least in part just an excuse for Kat. She didn\'t know what she wanted to do, and this helped push the decision back just a little bit further.

It took a full hour of this before Kat decided to leave. She carefully moved Lily from her stomach to the pillow she\'d been using and hoped it was warm enough for Lily not to notice. Of course, Lily immediately noticed, her nose twitching, eyes scrunched in dissatisfaction, but she didn\'t wake up. Kat still frowned at the sight, but her desire to go for a walk was stronger. If Lily was awake she\'d stay, but for now? It was time to adventure.

Kat walked carefully through the halls, making sure not to wake anyone. She nearly yelled in surprise when she found \'Mint\' behind the counter. It was certainly her body, and the eyes were open, but there was clearly nobody home. The body wasn\'t moving at all, and the eyes looked dull and lifeless. Kat even waved her hand in front of it just to test.

*Ok this is just weird. Like… I know these bodies the dryads use aren\'t actually their bodies… but Thyme makes it seem so fluid. As if the body is just an extension and they\'re more like shapeshifters. Seeing the one Mint uses just… sitting here completely motionless is more than a bit disturbing. It\'s almost like she\'s been turned to stone by Medusa or something. It\'s weird.*

Shaking away those creepy thoughts, Kat made her way out of the inn and onto the beach. Just as Kat was about to pick a random direction, she saw a burst of light off towards the end of the island. With a shrug Kat turned that way and headed off. Curious to see what she\'d find. Kat sped up a bit when she saw the light show continuing, so it didn\'t take long for Kat to spot what was going on.

Asteodia was playing with fire. Literally. She was probably just practicing her magic, but the way she was looking at the bonfire she\'d built up was a bit weird. Kat couldn\'t place the emotions on Asteodia\'s face, though that was probably because most of it was facing away from Kat.

A quick jog later and Kat was there. "Hello Asteodia, can\'t sleep either?" asked the demon.

Asteodia turned slowly, apparently not scared by Kat\'s presence… only to just nod and turn back to the fire. "Um…? are you alright?" asked Kat.

Asteodia sighed. "Not really. I guess sometime in the afternoon it sunk in that I nearly cost myself a chance at the win this afternoon. Might be even worse that my idea wasn\'t even good enough to get second place, so it was a stupid risk I never should\'ve taken,"

"But it was just a mistake right?" said Kat.

"That\'s just an excuse," bit out Asteodia. "The fact that it was a mistake is probably worse then if I\'d intended it. At least if I acted with intention, ready to accept the consequences I could hold my head up high for making a decisive play, and failing. No instead I make a mistake that would\'ve seen me take last place, and perhaps had my whole team penalised if Thyme felt like it… and I did it, by mistake. I can\'t afford to make such mistakes,"

*Well this isn\'t exactly what I thought I\'d be doing with my night, but it sure beats wandering around aimlessly pretending I know what I\'m doing. Now I can pretend I know how to give people therapy! Yay!* "I mistake is nothing to be ashamed of Asteodia, they happen to everyone, and this one didn\'t even have any consequences," said Kat.

"Then how will I ensure that I remember for next time if there was no punishment?" shot back Asteodia.

*Holy shit, if that doesn\'t scream \'I have parental issues\' I don\'t know what does. It could not be less clear if she was wearing a signboard that said \'I hate my parents\'. Question is… what exactly do I do about it? This is a larger landmine then I thought it was a few seconds ago. I\'m really not qualified for this. I mean, helping kids deal with losing their parents? That\'s something I can do. Whatever this is? What if I just make it worse?*

Kat didn\'t let her doubts show on her face, instead she relied on what experience she did have, "It seems to me that you\'re already punishing yourself quite thoroughly. If you really don\'t think this counts as a punishment, then would you look so melancholy?"

"If it truly is a punishment, it is a weak one," said Asteodia.

"Well your mistake was hardly a major crime. That\'s like asking why a thief isn\'t immediately sentenced to death. Especially if they were just a hungry child. You\'re only just becoming an adult Asteodia, and this was a very small mistake in a rather controlled environment. The harm done, is entirely negligible," said Kat carefully, looking for any negative reactions Asteodia might have to the explanation. So far so good.

"I suppose I can continue with this punishment then… if it even counts as one," said Asteodia.

*Not where I was going with this.* "Are you sure? Should you not wait till the tournament is over so that your punishment won\'t interfere with the future rounds?" And maybe you forget it all together or your team will be nearby to stop you? "Surely it\'s not good to be missing out on sleep right now," explained Kat.

Asteodia frowned at Kat\'s point. "Punishment should be administered immediately… but the potential for my own performance to suffer, leading to additional mistakes and additional punishments should be avoided… hmm… no I think punishment immediately is still the right choice,"

Kat scrambled for an answer, and managed one that was, hopefully, convincing, "Well are you really punishing yourself right now? Or are you also punishing your teammates? If you don\'t do well, everyone on your team is punished not just you. Isn\'t that kind of selfish?" *Really not how I wanted to spin this… but if it works?*

Asteodia seemed to freeze up for a second before nodding, "Yes… yes you make a good point. I suppose it would not do to punish my team members for my mistake. I shall try and rest, and then punish myself later, as you suggested,"

*God dammit. I guess it\'s fine for now… maybe I should enlist Marigold to help? Sure she\'s more on the wanting punishment side then the giving it… but I can\'t think of who else I can talk to about this. Marigold won\'t be allowed to compete today anyway, so it should be a good chance to talk…*